I, LAIL ANN HAYNES, am a wife, mother, friend and survivor.  This blog captures why I am the woman I have become.  The rough journey of a 31 year rape and incest survivor was simply bootcamp that created rare strength and beauty.  


Watch how my mind works as I discover and create the woman I want to be.  I am a true Gemini with different aspects to my personality.  I will explore at least three:

Giggles is happy and carefree, a  fun spirited child that lives within me, heehee!!!

Satin is feminine, passionate and sexy.  This persona is somewhat of an exhibitionist, seductive and has very few inhibitions you’ll see…  Satin will draw emotions from each reader’s heart and possibly bring out fantasy and longing…

Tear Drops is my sad side, depression sometimes invades me.  Tear Drops feels other’s emotions physically as if they are her own feelings…  the extremely compassionate side of me.  Giggles, Satin and Tear Drops are only three personas, there are many…

Follow this blog loyally to see who else appears and/or develops as time goes on.  Realize who lives within YOU and find out what defines “true beauty”.  Rainbows appear after the storm has passed.  I finally found my rainbow and realized that rainbow lies within my shell, my physical body.  I work to express every color that encompasses me.  Who knows what YOU will discover about yourself as you learn about Giggles, Satin, Tear Drops and “true beauty”….


by Robert Frost

We dance round in a ring and suppose,
But the Secret sits in the middle and knows. 

“Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over ……..  it became a BUTTERFLY!!!”


About the Writer:  ME!!!

I am a wife, mother, friend and survivor, AS WELL AS MUCH, MUCH MORE. The longest part of my journey was 31 years of incestuous rape at the hand of my biological father and older, adopted brother. Like most sexual abuse victims, I went into an abusive marriage for quite a time, six very painful years. My ex husband was mentally, physically and sexually abusive through those years… It took me a very long time to realize I was actually worthy of being treated well. I had no idea until I met my husband, Patrick, what healthy love was. 

The story of my life is extremely unbelievable. It is like the story I watched on http://www.godvine.com about the baby born without a heartbeat for 20 minutes that survived and lives healthy as can be years later without a single disability. UNBELIEVABLE. There is no scientific explanation how I am alive. You will read about that on a post I wrote titled “I COMMITTED SUICIDE.” That day is the the day I found out God’s power and control in my life and my lack of both. That is the day I realized I believe in God and I always had without knowing it. You will have to read to find out why. That is one post i hope all my readers make sure to read. It is a post that will change even your own life.

This blog captures why I am the woman I have become. My dream is to use my life experience in order to bring out the very best in each person I meet. Someday, I hope to become a published author who touches so many hearts and souls around this world of ours. I also have aspirations of doing more public speaking and teaching others how to overcome the most unbelievable, unimaginable realities in this world. My hopes are that subjects society deams “taboo”, that are so many of our regular realities, will finally be discussed openly and the abusers will no longer have power over us. Our secrets will be freed!

Thank you for reading my experiences and stories. I am so thankful for being heard at last. I hope you return often. Love and blessings. xo


10 responses to “About

  1. Love your blog and truthful creative drive. As a fellow writer, I believe that we must surrender pieces of ourselves to the creative journey, in order to capture readers.

    Love what you’re doing and looking forward to reading more.

    Blessings and Happy Writing!

    • Thank you, El! I encourage all my readers to visit and follow my fellow Survivor/Thriver’s blog also. We are all in this together and each person has an amazing unique story for you to personally watch unfold. God bless you, El! Post a link if you wish, please. XO ❤

  2. Thank you, Freddy! I value your opinion so much. I admire your work as well, sweetheart. Please feel free to post a link here if you wish. We are all in this together, my friend. Love to you always. XO! ❤

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